The body is the self, and contrary to what many of us believe, you can never quite have high self esteem (and consequently happiness) unless you learn to love your body.
Granted, learning to love your body is not very easy. We have been conditioned to feel that our bodies are not ‘ideal’ – and that there is an ‘ideal’ body that we would rather be in. Many of the beliefs which cause us not to love our bodies are very deeply ingrained in our psyches, and some can actually be traced back to our childhood, starting with what our parents told us about our bodies (and the whole concept of the role of the body in the self), how our friends at school treated us with respect to our bodies (kids can be especially unkind to others who are different in some way) as well as the impact of the media on our body image.
The effect of the media on our respect self-images is particularly worth of special note. The media, perhaps influenced by the fashion and weight loss industries has continually perpetuated the view that the ideal body looks a certain way, and anyone who doesn’t reach this ideal is implicitly said to be ugly. Of course this is a misguided notion, seeing that we are all meant to be different, that it takes all sorts to make an interesting world, and that if we all looked alike (ultra-thin and ultra ‘cute’) the world would be a very boring place indeed. In such a world, for instance, you would have no one to compare yourself to, which is a big killjoy seeing that we derive a considerable portion of our happiness from comparing ourselves with others and feeling that when all is said and done, we are still better off than someone else (even if that happens to be a delusion).
Therefore the way to learn to love your body is to dispel all these fallacious notions that make you not to love your body in the first place. Notions like the one that there is an ‘ideal’ body that everyone ought to have can only lead to unhappiness as all people will never be same, and it is not desirable anyway. Notions like the one that others will love you when you have a better body might have a grain of truth in them, but in most cases, whatever body you happen to have, people only love you as much as you love yourself and as much as they recorn that you can be of some help to them.
Another way to love yourself is to celebrate you uniqueness. You were made the way you are for a reason, and you can always turn the way you are to your advantage, if only you think about it hard enough. Unknown to many ‘huge’ people who are forever seeking smaller body forms, for instance, is the fact that a huge body represents ‘a strong presence’ and in many forums, there are many people who will respect you and love simply on account of your huge. (Of course, if you are huge in an unhealthy way, you should consider losing the extra weight – but from a point of self love).